10 months without sleep

November 17, 2011
:::So it's been a while since I posted anything..so here it goes.. Emma is now 10 months old.. she is a crawling champ. Not too interested in walking..well I should say..she isn't interested in walking at all.. She does walk around stuff and hold on to it.. but no steps without holding on. She stands up alone...then realizes it.. and drops down to her butt and starts crawling. I feel like I should start a pool about when she will start walking..
Everyone tells me not to rush it.. because when she starts walking..that's when all the ....."fun" starts..

So..10 months into it.. and Emma still refuses to sleep thru the night..so needless to say I am exhausted..miserable and look like hell . I get told constantly to let her "cry it out"..well I would like to tell you that is easier said than done. We live in a 1 br apt and I sleep in the living room on the couch while Emma sleeps in her crib next to me. So.. being within 10 feet of a screaming baby isn't the most relaxing place to be. From what I am told and read ...She is using me as a pacifier since I breastfeed.. she is looking for comfort in nursing. So I have to try and break her of that. :( Once she wakes up.. I nurse her for like 10-15 minutes then she is back to sleep. Which is much better than her staying up for hours.. I get that. But all this interrupted sleep is killing me. I would say on average I get about 2 hours of uninterrupted sleep per night. if that. As I write this.. Emma is screaming and crying and staring at me. I hate this...it makes me so sad/anxious/nuts. And tonight I gave her chamomile tea.. which from what I read ..and heard it is "supposed" to work.. Well 1oz down..and she is still up and screaming..

I have well rested mothers envy, I can't stand hearing people say..Oh.. my baby sleeps great ...they always have. If they only knew what I am doing to them in my mind as they are telling me this....they would probably just shut up and leave me alone. But no such luck much like the unsolicited advice I receive I still get told how everyone else's baby is sleeping so well.. and that I should do this..and do that.. yeah yeah yeah.

November 18, 2011
::: Update.. The chamomile tea did absolutely nothing.. sigh.. She only drank about an ounce.. So I will try again tonight and try and get her to drink more. In the mean time I am gonna search the internet trying to find something...I am desperate at this point. I just want to sleep O_o

So today..Emma has a playdate with her little friend Gianna :) But first...mommy needs some coffee and we are out of coffee ...so once Emma wakes up again.. I am gonna have to bundle her up and run to DD to get some coffee.. Right now its about 30 degrees outside..brrr.. And let me just say I cannot believe it is almost Christmas..and Emma will be 1 soon!! crazy ...this year flew by. I am gonna look thru her pics and post a timeline of sorts...Sometimes I miss my little newborn. But honestly Emma is at such a fun age right now.. I love it.

I am currently trying to come up with some sort of timeline to display at her 1st birthday party.. :)
Well .. I am out of here for now.. :) Have a great day

Happy 9 Months Boogie Bear!!!

Emma is 9 months today!! She got her Hep shot & her flu shot & she was quite the little trooper.. like always :) She goes next month for her 2nd dose of the flu vaccine and then her next checkup is at 12 months :)

Here are her stats !!

She is 27 inches long
She weighs 18 lbs and 3 oz
and her little nugget (her head) is 17 1/4 inches
and her iron is good.. so no anemia.

She passed her developmental assessment with flying colors!! She has her next assessment at 12 and 18 months they do the autism screening test .

I took her to Target and got her a new sippy cup with a straw to celebrate !! I also found a shirt and leggings for her to wear under her bumble bee costume for halloween :)


Right now.. Emma is eating her blueberry puffs.. and of course.. sharing them with Miya


3 months til the big "1" ...I got the venue for her party and have been buying little stuff here and there for her party :) Today I got tote bags for the goodie bags :)

Like I have mentioned before.. I never intended on having children. And I would never consider my precious daughter to be an "accident" she was a pleasant surprise.
Being a mother has proved to be the best experience of my entire life.. even with the hours.. days.. of sleep that I lost.. it is all worth it.

8 months :)

Well Emma is 8 months now.. she is a full time crawler and says mama and dada .. it's nothing short of adorable. She is quite the mover as I type this now.. I have one eye on her. She is playing with the dog's leash.. Which brings me to a question I ask myself daily.. She has all these toys scattered across my living room floor.. however she would much rather play with the dog's leash...her diapers ...her clothing..my laptop and my cell phone.. Why do they even make toys? My daughter's obsession with cell phones convinced me to dig out my old Blackberry and give it to her to play with. It has a pink cover like my current phone.. so "sometimes" she is tricked...that is until she sees my phone .. O-o


The other day much to our surprise she took 3 steps all on her own from daddy to mommy :) As exciting as that is.. It makes me so nervous.. walking.. soon?? Oh lord.. hahah

Emma with her newest toy.. her 1st ball :) She picked it out all by  herself.

Gotta cut this short.. she is up and on the move.. currently standing at the coffee table trying to get to my keyboard. I will try and keep my entries a little more current. 

xoxoox

What's in a name?

Emma means healer of the universe, universal or nurse.. I think this name fits her perfectly.. she makes everyone smile that meets her.. she has this way about her.. that makes people happy.. :) I think we picked the right name for her.. her middle name Jo means god will increase.. her middle name was picked to honor her late grandfather.. my dad .

I looked high and low for a name for her that meant something.. I would have never named her something unless I loved the meaning.. and Emma Jo was that name. Now that I know her ..( on the outside of my belly) I know this name was meant for her.. She is definitely the healer of my universe.

The love of my life..the healer of my universe 

What's the 411 ? Yeah...she's got it going on.

It is August 5...where did the summer go? Emma will be 7 months on Sunday! Emma is now rolling around everywhere.. hasn't quite grasped the concept of crawling yet..YET..but then again from what I read not ever baby crawls.. so maybe she will just roll around everywhere until she starts walking? O_o possibly.

Emma..just rolling around. 

And much to my surprise ..I found out Wednesday that Emma now goes from laying down to sitting up on her own.. I first saw her do it Wednesday night.. but daddy says he saw her do it on ..Monday. 

Emma being beautiful <3

Emma eats like a champ.. she doesn't take after anyone strange.. She loves everything.. her new favorite is mangoes and peach cobbler! ..I have switched her completely to whole wheat and mixed grain cereal. She drinks from a sippy cup and really won't even take a bottle anymore. 

My Big Girl :)

She also "dances" to music..It's the cutest thing.. and she is starting to mimic different things we do.. :)

I am so proud of this chubby wittle baby :)

Emma is now 6 months old , where did time go?!?!

Emma's  Milestones :) (Simply Accomplishments & What else is going on with Emma )

Rolling from front to back and vice versa 

Sitting up unsupported 

Stage 2 baby food 

Rice,Whole Wheat & Mixed grain cereal

Yogurt 

Recognizing familiar faces and voices

Reaching out for me when she wants me 

Baby Crunches

Standing up while holding on to something 

Possibly Teething, chewing on EVERYTHING

Getting her own personality

Starting to look like mommy now

Loves the pool

Emma is 16 lbs and 25 inches long.. :)

Mommy & Baby 

Loving some Bubbles

A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on....

Take a sprinkling of fairy dust,
An angel's single feather,
Also a dash of love and care,
Then mix them both together.
Add a sentiment or two,
A thoughtful wish or line,
A touch of stardust, a sunshine ray...
It's a recipe, for a Baby Girl truly fine.

Why my body is better than her body....

I can't help looking at other women and seeing their "perfect" bodies and wanting to smack them...cry.. throw up and eat a cheeseburger.. while I don't do all of these things when this happens.. I may do one or two of them.. but that's besides the point..

I look at my stretch marked belly.. my huge ass and thighs and sigh.. just last year.. I was skinny.. wearing cute clothes.. sporting a bikini.. now.. look at me..

But..then a light bulb goes off.. while some women (freaks of nature) go back to looking the same way they did before the baby 2 months after they give birth....I am a part of the bigger percentage..literally bigger.. that didn't go right back to my pre-baby body as much as this drives me insane.. and makes me sad...my body is better than most bodies.. because my body MADE a baby and was HOME to that baby for 37 weeks...most skinny little bitches can't say that.. so there.. in YOUR face.

If you are one of those freaks of nature that went right back to their pre baby bodies.. I don't want to offend you. but I do hate you.

xoxo
Tanya

My Baybay :)

I figured I would update everyone on what Emma is doing nowadays :)

She is has tried all of the fruits and veggies that Gerber makes for Stage 1 and LOVES them.. She has also tried and LOVES Beech Nut 's Beef,Chicken, & Turkey :) She tries to feed herself..she either takes the spoon from me..or grabs the food off of the spoon and smashes it in her mouth..& all over her face ! It's quite a mess :) She eats cereal with fruit in the morning..her milk throughout the day ...then for dinner she gets a meat and a veggie.. sometimes she is a little piggy and eats her meat and 2 containers of veggies (she doesnt get alot of meat ..because its very thick ) 

She's doing much better with her infection too..She is on her 2nd dose of antibiotics and had all her tests come back normal!! She was a trooper in the hospital during her VCUG (I think thats what its called ) they put a catheter in.. ran dye and liquid into her bladder and took x-rays while she peed. They had to make sure her valves weren't reversed.. since she had an UTI and at the ER wasnt successful taking an urine sample thru a catheter her dr wanted to make sure it was an UTI and not the reflux problem in her valves. She also got a ultrasound of her kidneys which also came back normal. So everything is good.. I think maybe she infection came from too many bubbles in the bath.. I am being more cautious of that now. 

She rolls over all the time now. However only from her back to belly.. She hasn't master belly to back yet ...But she rolls over in her crib and sleeps on her belly now... or she sleeps on her side :) She doesn't always sleep thru the night.. but I am okay with that.. seeing that little smile in the middle of the night.. makes it all worth it. And I have been co-sleeping ...I know I know.. huge mistake. .. but whatever.. I love her sleeping with me :) Sometimes she wakes up in the middle of the night and isn't hungry.. she just wants to sleep with me.. I have and ...I am creating a monster.. most likely. lol

She sits up with some support.. She can sit unsupported for a few seconds then topples over. She is getting better at it.. She has sat up without support for about 30 seconds.. but that doesn't happen that often .But she is getting there ;)

She found her "voice" and is quite vocal about everything lol.. She also "cheers" for herself.. when she does something she screams on top of her lungs and laughes its the cutest thing ever.. AND...she has the BABY LAUGH now!! the cute contagious BABY LAUGH! She is ticklish on her belly !!It is so cute!!! I am trying to get a video of it! 

She also tries to hold her bottle when I feed her.. She can hold it for like 10 seconds then it drops lol But she is getting better at it more and more each day . 

And I am sure of it now .. she is a thumbsucker.. it is official .. She falls asleep like that .. all the time.. and I think it is friggin adorable!! :0)

We got her a walker with some of her baptism money ...but her little feet don't touch yet :( oh well.. I am sure it won't be long.. 

Oh and during her tests she had to get these past couple weeks.. SHE WAS A TROOPER.. only crying a little bit and after it was all said and done.. was back to smiling like usual... :) She is my little ray of sunshine.. :)

And breastfeeding is still going well.. I do supplement with formula every now and then. So she is getting bonus vitamins!! 

Well that's Emma in a nutshell right now :)

Hi my name is Tanya ... and uh.. I am addicted to reading other mom's blogs

As I watch Emma swing in her swing this morning.. I drink my coffee and say to myself... if Emma loves a good argument as much as me...she will be a shoe in for law school.
I have recently become addicted to blogs and other threads on different parenting websites.. While it annoys me when mothers feel the need to attack each other for different ways of parenting.. I still LOVE love love an argument.. I love debates.. I am so interested in hearing both sides.. Sometimes I like to play the jury and decide who is "right" in my head...I have read threads with people butting heads from everything from circumsizing your little boy to vaccinations for your baby.. while I have opinions about all of these topics.. Does that make me right?? Probably not. But thats why we all have our own opinions and different views.. The world would be really boring if everyone thought the same way .. right? Even though this is pretty much common sense.. Some people especially mothers believe it's their way or the highway.. I find these women.. annoying but amusing all at the same time.


I have seen mothers being attacked by other mothers (virtually of course.. not fisticuffs) for being working mothers.. the "perfect" mother.. stays at home with their child. And I will speak for most of us "working" mothers.. We ...(again...most of us) WISH we had the choice to stay home.. But realistically.. most moms do not have this option.. mostly for financial reasons. I know myself.. if my husband came home and said honey I got a 3 figure raise ... and you dont have to work.. I would do cart wheels across my living room..in our small 1 bedroom apartment and LOVE and welcome the idea of not working and dedicating my day to my daughter and  housework.. and also welcome the idea of being able to afford a 2 bed room ..ahh to dream. I read time and time again mothers stating that working mothers that are having difficulty finding a good sitter.. daycare etc.. should "just stay home" .. yeah if it were that easy.. Unfortunately.. Myself and alot of my working mom friends.. haven't had anything handed to them and we have to work for what we have. I think.. the key word is "think" that working mothers need props.. they work every day all day and then when they are done work they work some more.. a different type of work.. So I think it makes us pretty damn great if you ask me.


Another topic.. Breastfeeding.. Another one that hits close to home.. Breastfeeding mothers attacking formula feedings moms for not breastfeeding.. OR formula feeding mothers.. saying breastfeeding is weird.. OR calling BF'ing mothers.. treehugging hippies.. So I will start this off by saying .. I breastfeed and I couldn't care any less.. if you do or not.. and I certainly.. do NOT hug trees... I even.. insert gasp ..dont always recycle.. yea I said it. I decided to breastfeed my daughter not to prove anything to you or anyone else.. I did it because I felt it was best for me and my daughter.. not to mention the fact that breastfeeding is pretty much free.. and formula costs WAY too much. The health side of it was a major factor in my decision.. But do I give two "you know whats" if you do or not? No.. not at all. Breastfeeding is definitely not easy and I certainly understand mothers who decide not to do it.. for whatever reason they choose not to.. Breastfeeding and the working mom.. is nothing short of a pain in the ass. But I still do it.. not because I am better than you and not because I am a tree hugging hippie.. I do it because thats what I want to do.. Unlike alot of BF'ing mothers.. I have NOT joined the BF'ing mafia.. or cult if you will.. I won't turn my nose up at other mothers for ..gasp.. feeding their baby formula.. guess what.. I supplement with formula! The BF'ing community will probably shun me for this! Oh no!

Vaccinations.. Oh god this is a huge one.. The debate will never end.. Vaccines are poison.. if there is one thing I despise hearing.. It's this one.. I was vaccinated with all the vaccines they had at the time.. and I wasn't "poisoned".. and if that's how you feel.. that's your perogative .. It's your baby.. if you choose not to vaccinate them.. that's your decision.. but why attack other mother's for their choice to do so?


So I will continue to read blogs and other threads and enjoy people arguing..

my breastfed..vaccinated ..daughter of a working mom..:)

vote for emma!!

the contest is still going on!! its on a week to week basis! please vote for my little boogiebear!!
http://photos.parents.com/cutekid/18/2011/4394

yes...she is adorable and deserves to be on the cover of parents magazine!!